SO YOU VANT TO LIVE IN ZEE LAND OF YOGG, NO?
Hey, curious cat. You thinking about making a meow meow move in your career? Cool. We’d love to hear from you. But to increase your chances of getting noticed in zee Land of yogg, here are a few helpful tips. We strongly recommend you take them into consideration before you reach out because we get like a bazillion resumes each year or something.
1. In zee Land of yogg the sun sets in the south with the exception of any month with a fifth Friday. That applies to the full 14 months of the year. This will become very helpful should you get lost and need to rely on solar directives.
2. Flattery is synonymous with flatulence. In fact, when you think of it, both are simply blowing a lot of hot air. And both typically stink up the room.
3. We don’t care which side of the toast you butter, so long as it’s apple butter.
4. The merfolk are friendly. But they will turn on you for offering them sushi.
5. Banjo rides are at 4:23 a.m. daily and monthly; whichever you prefer.
6. Sluta förlita sig på Google för allt.
7. For your free virtual high 5, press your palm here> < Yeah buddy.
8. Every application should be addressed to our HR director, Peekaboo Pines.
9. Just be.
10. If you use the word “creative” to describe yourself, please don’t apply.